Carolyn* fell pregnant to get her lover to start a real relationship with her. Her plan backfired but through the heartache she learnt the true meaning of love.
“When I met Andy* I knew that he was already engaged to someone else, but that didn’t stop me from falling in love with him. Andy was handsome, smart, funny and gentlemanly. He had it all and I was hell-bent on being a part of his life – and making him a part of mine. Because my company worked quite closely with his, we got to see each other quite frequently, and after just one month of working together, we began a sexual relationship.
A Forbidden Affair
Dating an engaged man went against all the values I’d been raised with, but I couldn’t stay away from Andy. We had the most amazing conversations and the sex was intense and passionate.
His fiancée, Jen*, travelled a lot for work, so whenever she was away, Andy would stay over at my place or we would book a hotel room. I cherished all those nights we were able to spend together.
But Andy made it clear to me that he would never break off his engagement with Jen. They’d already bought a flat and their families were close, and Andy told me that he couldn’t see a future without her.
I didn’t tell my friends and family about my relationship with Andy because I knew they would not approve. This period was actually the loneliest I’d ever been in my life – I couldn’t talk about Andy with the people I loved the most and I couldn’t be with Andy in the way I wanted.
I spent many nights crying, wishing for this man to tell me that he loved and wanted only me. I hated the fact that I was in love with him and that he was emotionally unavailable, but what disgusted me even more was that he seemed not to take our relationship – if you could call it that – seriously.
For the two months that Andy and I were involved with each other, I prayed that something would happen to make him break off his engagement to Jen and make me his girlfriend, but nothing ever did.
Then, I decided to take matters into my own hands.
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